Found Annotations with Jessica Shernburn
Welcome to Day 23 of Verselove. We are so happy you are here, however you choose to be present. If you know what to do, carry on; if you are not sure, begin by reading the inspiration and mentor poem, then scroll to the comment section to post your poem. Please respond to at least three other poets in celebration of words, phrases, ideas, and craft that speak to you. Click here for more information on the Verselove. Share a highlight from your experiences thus far here.
Jessica Shernburn lives in Chicago, Illinois where she teaches English at Stephen T. Mather High School. She has served as a Representative-at-Large within the Michigan Council of Teachers of English and a Teacher Advisory Group Member for the Zekelman Holocaust Memorial Center. In addition to writing poetry, Jessica enjoys hiking, kayaking, and penning sarcastic quips. She is a proud mother to two cats, Ollie and Davie, who enjoy long naps and spilling mugs of black tea.
Inspiration
Many of us have told our students that annotation is simply “talking back to the text”: stating the first thoughts and questions that come to mind when reading a poem, without fear of judgment or being “wrong.” But how often do we pause and consider the beauty and poetry in our annotations? What story might they tell?
Our gut reactions to and authentic questions about a text can unlock some of our most creative thinking. Using annotations as a springboard for a found poem allows us to shape these spontaneous thoughts into a more polished piece.
Process
- Find 1-3 short pieces of text to read and annotate. Alternatively, find texts you have already annotated: examples you have modeled for your students, your responses to student work, books you have marked up, etc.
- Annotate the piece(s). In the margins, note your thoughts, questions, and connections to the text. If you are working with a piece you have previously annotated, search for new places to add more reactions or questions.
- Re-read your annotations. Circle or star any interesting diction or phrases.
- Incorporate your chosen words or phrases into a found annotation poem.
Jessica’s Poem
Past Tense Would Work Better Here
by Jessica Sherburn
Created from annotations on a friend’s poem draft
Was there emptiness
before? Abstract, but
also exhilarating?
I’m visualizing
a metaphor
of seeds:
You’ve wondered,
hungered for more.
Transformed.
Appreciate the bones,
but don’t be afraid
to celebrate growth.
Your Turn
Now, scroll to the comment section below to write your own poem. (This is a public space, so you may use only your first name or initials depending on your privacy preferences.) Not ready? That’s okay. Read the poems already posted for more inspiration. Ponder your own throughout the day. Return later. And, if the prompt does not work for you, that is fine. All writing is welcome. Just write something. Oh, and a note about drafting: Since we are writing in short bursts, we all understand (and even welcome) the typos and partial poems that remind us we are human and that writing is always becoming.
Also, in the spirit of reciprocity, please respond to at least three other poets today.
Hi Jessica! I never thought about this thought before. Annotation’s roles are to help the student clear up the text’s meaning. Now how do we see our annotations as a whole? I recently helped a student unpack their history reading packet. The passage was about “Fighting for Women’s Rights.” Reflecting on my annotations with the student, and being a female (almost) teacher, it was interesting what I came up with to help him understand what was going on back then.
Women Power
(ideas from annotations about 4th grade passage on Women’s Rights)
Who is who,
and who is right?
What is fair
and what is right?
We’re all humans,
It’s time to fight.
Women’s voting
what a beautiful sight.
Jessica, I’m posting this late — I had to wait until I was at school to find an annotated book, but I found my old college copy of Nathaniel Hawthorne’s Tales (love him!) and “found” this poem in the annotations — what a cool exercise this was!
“She”
Famous poisoner
praises the Bible.
Hypocrisy of the Puritans,
She
gives them meaning
and then defines it.
Circumstances of his departure
have
lengthened the distance
and explanations will now
have to accompany
feelings.
Tears of Christ:
Is this where the prayers go?
Art, influencing life,
Influencing art.
Images of the moon;
destruction of mixed cultures
poke at Transcendentalism:
flawless and finished.
Yearnings of the spirit
vs.
Limitations of the flesh
Again, religious
influence
of woman.
I hit the book again and couldn’t resist writing a companion!
“He”
Loneliness:
Individuality.
Being a Puritan
makes one happier
than being a Merry mounter.
The intervention of fate
into the best laid
of human plans
…but it will when he
least
expects it.
His interesting position
in relation to history:
Involved in it
Studies it
Doesn’t influence it.
He has the knowledge.
Like their religion –
their ability to sacrifice
anything
for their religion –
their affinity,
almost,
for persecution –
He’s almost like a
Greek warrior:
a Biblical mythology.
Hey anyone, everyone, sorry if I send you down a rabbit hole of previous prompts, but I vaguely remember a poem that Jennifer mentioned – “This is a Photograph of Me” Atwood – being used as part of a prompt for verselove or one of the monthly writes. Do you have any idea? Anyone? I loved that poem and I think I read it for the first time for one of these prompts ? TIA!
Everything we do shapes the world around us – including the stories we tell. In his article “The Dangers of Cynical Sci-Fi Disaster Stories”, Cory Doctorow writes about how dystopian sci-fi has made us collectively lose faith in the humanity of our neighbors. This article gives voice to a core belief of mine that fiction can shape minds and is the basis of my found poem.
Carpe Narratio
Fiction is
A thought experiment
‘An intuition pump’
All fiction is a study of
‘Problems & their solutions’
And sci-fi has become
A problem unto itself
Giving rise to
‘Elite Panic’
Filled with barbaric heroes
‘Coated in a fragile veneer of civilization’
All writers write the same stories.
All future is bleak
‘People are awful!’
But are we really? No!
We’re a bunch of
‘Self-rescuing princesses’!
Sci-fi does a disservice
Discrediting humanity.
People are complicated,
People are layered – like onions!
But this bleak sci-fi future
Has dug roots into our present
We didn’t get our hoverboards,
We got surveilled, manipulated!
Ads based on whispered conversations.
Fiction is
A thought experiment
An intuition pump
The stories we tell
Need changing.
The narrative
needs seizing.
Jessica, I really appreciated the concept and inspiration for today’s poem. It is the end of the day, and I am very tired, so had a hard time creating. I’m not totally satisfied with this, but here goes.
This poem is derived from a small number of the annotations I have made in Brené Brown’s book Dare to Lead. At EPIClearners, we are doing a close read and conducting vulnerable conversations about how the concepts apply in teaching and learning environments.
get clear:
whose opinions of you
matter?
seek those who love you,
not despite your imperfections,
but because of them.
seek first to understand
then to be understood.
I am going down this path
same as, and with, you.
let us travel together,
build a map
of love, belonging, and joy
together.
This is a sweet sweet poem, Charlene. For some reason, the words and phrasing in here brought to mind the prayer of St. Francis – the church I grew up in, so I knew that prayer well at one time. “to be understood, as to understand;” comes from the prayer as well as the “seek” word. In a way, perhaps this is like a personal prayer. Amen!
Charlene, this is such an important poem. I needed this today. Thank you!
Jessica,
This is such an interesting idea for a prompt, thank you! I find myself on the road, without many annotated or annotatable texts, but I do happen to have with me an article that I assigned in a Hip Hop and Philosophy class that I co-teach with my wife. The article is entitled “Afrofuturism takes flight: from Sun Ra to Janelle Monae”.
https://www.theguardian.com/music/2014/jul/24/space-is-the-place-flying-lotus-janelle-monae-afrofuturism
Space is the Place
Is anyone more of an Afrofuturist
than Grandmaster Flash?
Tinkerer, visionary, cosmic time traveller
Is the loop not a portal to the multiverse?
You can make the future way out of
no way when you have the will
There is power in speculation
Who’s to say that Drexciya is wrong?
Perhaps Atlantis is the child of the
Middle Passage
Sun Ra looked to the sky
the future is intergalactic
Marcus Garvey’s black star
is a space ship and
Nikki G wants a ride
Janelle Monae showed us
humanity in androids–
that the other is
us
Flash gave us
transglobal
interconnectedness
by spinning us
backwards and showing us
the present
in the past,
making a new future
What a great weaving of ideas and people/musicians and your perceptions of them focused on this theme. And – meh – I only know a few of these references, sorry – but that’s what can also make a poem a ton of fun to “research” and find out the ‘meaning’ behind some of its referents (like the song American Pie that is so thickly layered with cultural references). I appreciate the way this gives a positive perspective on a genre and musicians who do not always (did not ever) get their due props. Nicely crafted for an ‘on the road’ contribution, Dave! The class you co-teach sounds like something students would love!
Jessica, this prompt was really interesting to me! My poem is about a recipe with found annotations from my grandmother. Click here (https://docs.google.com/document/d/1zSGrN-TcfgnZM-hxCdKVV1EAX_G_4uFWvxvCxY5kRCU/edit?usp=sharing) or look at the image attached. It was fun “having a conversation” with generations of women in my family: my grandma, my great-great grandma, and me.
Rachelle,
I struggled with this prompt, but I like how you made it into more of a story. I’m not sure I’d have liked the pie (ew, raisins), but it makes for a good story poem.
Oh my gosh, Rachelle – ! I hand’t even considered the cookbooks in the house. Absolutely there was never a recipe that was “as is.” Always some this or that commenting on the side and any space between the ingredients list! I love how this covers such a span of time – and records history in the kinds of events of our culture – starting with the recipe itself, no doubt all those spices to cover up the very rough piece of meat. But whole-animal butchery is a beautiful no-waste approach, and one we don’t see today. Nicely conceived and crafted!
I loved this prompt! I took my annotations from Everyone Can Write by Peter Elbow. It was nice to go back and read my annotations. 🙂
I’m a writer
Where is this nervousness
coming from? Once concentration
comes, frustration may vanish
Audience matters
but so do feelings and
my goal as a writer
Sometimes private writing
can turn to public, while public
writing may end up being private
A supportive audience is what
keeps a writer typing, thinking, and
finding a purpose for the written piece
Carolina, simply reading your annotations from this piece reminds me of some of my core (but forgotten) philosophies as a teacher-writer. Thank you for this reminder, and thank you for sharing your found annotations!
Wow, really, thank you! These are like writers mantras – Elbow distillations but also with your own perspective blended in. I’d like these to just be on posters around the room with my students as we write. I love the fluidity of each of these, that they flex to take in different ways of seeing writing and the role of the humans involved. Lovely take on the prompt, Carolina. Nice!
It was interesting to explore my annotations in grading my AP seniors’ first poetry analysis essays of the year, about the poem “XIV” by Derek Walcott. These annotations are an interesting combination of his words, my students’ words, and my words.
aftermath of childhood
in the trance of
another world,
shadows walk.
folk stories are
magic.
the tremendously
imaginative childish
mind
turns elements of the
world
into animals or even
fantastical beings
the threatening sunset
conveys
a somber, distressing
feeling,
but the house
always waits for her
return,
where the fireflies
convey a sense of
harmony and tranquility
and we always
live in the
moment.
Julie– you made such a wonderful collage of these annotations that this poems reads unique to itself. I just read XIV for the first time after reading your poem, and I loved that line of “there’s childhood and childhood’s aftermath”. Your title makes it all the more fitting. Thank you for sharing!
What a wonderful combination of words, Julie! Such a pleasure to read. Thanks for sharing.
I love to annotate. It was my favorite thing to do in college-how I loved knowing the books I purchased were mine and I felt I looked smart with a book filled with sticky notes and highlights!
I am working on a book in verse and in it, there is a teacher who has prompts to start class that are helping this character deal with anxiety. So, I looked for a poem on anxiety and wrote as she would annotate and think. It’s rough!
Fear by Ciaran Carson https://poets.org/poem/fear
Poetry Wednesday
This time one called Fear
And already I’m interested
Because fear lives within me
Swirls within
Settles within.
I grab my highlighter
Purple today
And a pencil
And begin to read.
Once. Twice. Three times.
Letting the words travel through me
Absorb into me
Until I begin to understand.
I see myself in this poem
I see my constant worrying
I see myself looking for things to fear
I see myself scared to leave
I see myself buried in fear
I fear the fog will never leave
I fear mom will succumb
I fear Keeley will leave me
I fear Marx will take her
I fear today
I fear tomorrow
I fear my fears are out of control.
Alexis. I love how you approached the prompt today! You reminded me of the annotation that I do enjoy—which is poetry— in those first two stanzas; you remind me why I reas poetry in the last two. You capture the comfort of poetry reflecting ourselves back to us— all facets of who we are. Thanks for sharing!
This poem is a “life lesson.” I can definitely relate to most of it, but the “I see” verse really spoke to me. Thanks for sharing these annotations!
thank you for this challenge! I wrote an annotated version of my wedding vows a couple of weeks ago 🙂
https://middleagedmiddlechild.com/2022/03/31/i-am-my-beloveds/
Joel, this is priceless! Max put that 401k and wash your hands! Love it!
I’m pretty sure every couple creates annotations in their heads for their vows – though perhaps not all as beautifully considered as a plan for the relationship. I can just imagine some annotations that come after divorce – yeesh. I much prefer this approach, which is honest, heartfelt, and realistic. These establish a clear mindset that can hopefully help avoid some of the very pitfalls that lead to disruptions. Funny you had done this already before this prompt! Very cool approach to a lot of standard ‘text’ we encounter in our lives. And Jamaica Kincaid – yes – timeless! Great mentors you have, Joel!
About Your Personal Statement
As a reader I was thinking, okay
that’s where this is going,
and sometimes I was right,
sometimes not.
(Just pretend you know, okay?)
I think what is needed in this next
revision is a much clearer sense of storyline.
(Try to make up a story for the random bits of life, okay?)
I would run with an organizing frame here
that’s really explicit, and that’s pretty
obviously tied to opening sentences.
(I love implicitness, but most readers don’t. Be unpoetic.)
Here, the key sentence is about “narrowing
the problem space.”
(Damn. How did you do that?)
One last thought for now—
most of what you have in the first two plus
pages you can live without.
(I don’t mean your life pages, of course. Do I?)
I absolutely love your voice in this poem as your asides in the parenthesis.
thanks for your kind comment, Alexis.
Nice to know we give some of the same advice, Kevin! Ha! My favorites (and oft repeated) are “(Damn. How did you do that?)” – which I actually often say on these monthly poetry sharings! – and “most of what you have in the first two plus / pages you can live without.” Yup – that whole “get to the real starting point” is a tough one to get across. All of these are clear directives, but also show a kindness, the mentor’s guiding commentary. Nicely done. Great response to this prompt!
thank you Denise!
Kevin, I love the form your poem takes with the statements in parenthesis.
Jessica,
This is such an interesting prompt! I love the thought of using annotations to create poetry. I am sure using that in class will help kids see how meaningful their notes are. I have had a jam-packed day, and I don’t have easy access to any text that I have annotated, so I will leave it at this . . .
i am a reader.
I honestly can’t understand
how anyone isn’t.
reading is a relationship . . .
some ideas reach out and grab
us and shake us silly.
too often, our eyes gloss over
big ideas, life-changing ideas
or we never even pick up the text
that could change our lives.
really really powerful ideas get circled
or underlined or have a heart or star
etched next to them.
i use adobe creative cloud to permanently
capture ideas that touch my heart.
when I’m reading to absorb information,
i was taught to highlight key ideas.
i never really like that so
i learned to doodle it up with boxes and arrows, etc.
now that is called annotating.
talking to the text.
if kids give it a chance, it really works.
ideas sink in; they stick.
they burrow into us.
words become a part of us.
~Susan Ahlbrand
24 April 2022
Susan – real truth here. Annotating works like that for me… it’s a “burrow[ing] in”! Yes, you nailed that connection between reader and text. Susie
Susan,
I think annotating, like reading, is personal. We each have to find our own method, and teachers, I think, should offer options, such as you’ve found, such as one-pagers, sketch noting, doodle graphics, whatever works. I also don’t understand how people who don’t read can live that way. My eye problems have limited my reading of texts almost four months now, and I don’t think my doctor grasps what that means to me, so I really appreciate these words:
“too often, our eyes gloss over
big ideas, life-changing ideas
or we never even pick up the text
that could change our lives.”
Thanks for today’s prompt, Jessica. I have some new ideas for the classroom thanks to you! As for my own process today…I knew that whatever book I cracked today I’d see the same unhelpful scribbles.
Notes from a rogue English teacher
A straight line means
this whole chunk
seems important.
A squiggle means
this word or phrase or sentence
is definitely important.
A question mark means
WTF??
An exclamation mark means
WTF!!
A highlighted excerpt means
I found my highlighter!
Laura – I had to laugh. Decoding your annotation markups was totally fun. The repetition of question marks and exclamation marks…LOL! But finding the highlighter was hilarious! Delightful take on the prompt today. Witty. Susie
I enjoyed learning your code!
Love it!! <3 So fun to read!!
I confess, I don’t like annotating! I had to grab a copy of my son’s Crime and Punishment and went through his annotations.
Crime and Punishment
By Mo Daley 4-24-22
I’m over this cat and mouse game
there is so much friction lately
confinement may have driven us right over the edge
people don’t want to be noticed–
possibly oppressed by poverty
consumption
or a moral disease
I confess!
We need to put a new plan in motion
Mo, I’m right there with you on annotations, so I love what you’ve done with your son’s. This reads like a cousin of the blackout poem—clever crafting!
so funny . . . I love how you came up with something so coherent from these bits.
I don’t like annotations either! But I love how you improvised and wrote such a cool poem!
I will be completely honest, I am entering the last week of the semester and spent the entire day finishing up the work for two of my classes. At first I had a visceral reaction to this prompt so for the first time this month I decided to rebel. Please forgive me.
Rebelion
The text book is closed
The last assignment in
Please don’t make me go back
The checklist is finished
The sigh has been made
I really don’t want to go back
I stayed on task
I accomplished it all
Am I allowed to refuse to go back?
The forgotten paper was written
The detailed noted submitted
I absolutely will not go back
I’ve followed the rest of the instructions
No matter the prompt
But enough is enough and I’m not going back
LOL, Rob. I struggled with this prompt today, too. I’m glad you got all your work done, and I’m glad you wrote this poem. Sometimes it’s fun to rebel!
Rob, this is hilarious and so relatable. I especially like your lines: “The sigh has been made” and “The forgotten paper was written.” I just finished a class myself and I feel not wanting to look back so much.
I annotate with my students in World Literature (juniors and seniors)quite frequently. Their voices restore my faith in the future.
Student annotations of an article for College Writing 121/122:
“If People Could Immigrate Anywhere, Would Poverty be Eliminated?” – Shaun Raviv
The voices of
today’s youth
are loud
and confident.
Self-determination
is a very American idea.
Why is assimilation
a necessity?
Trying to be a solution,
violates the same
human rights
it is trying to protect.
Echoes
historical voting rights–
othering people.
Pro-immigration
but anti-human rights.
Legalized slavery?
Undocumented immigrants
are still human.
Very idealistic
and ignores the fact
that poverty exists
in First World countries, too.
I think
the world
is in
good hands.
I love the uplifting end: I think/the world/ is in/ good hands. Thank you for this poem today, Cara. I liked the questions posed… it reminds me of how I annotate a piece
What a telling list – even without knowing the source – how reflective this is of a global situation and our culture’s ‘response’ to it. I am also grateful to work with young people whose perspectives give me hope for their future. Great teachers make alllll the difference in the world, so thank YOU Cara!
I love found poetry, but I never would have thought about using it with my own annotations.
This was perfect timing for me as I am taking a Writing Across the Curriculum course, and I have to read “Designing Tasks for Active Thinking and Learning” by John Bean this week. I chose to do my homework for this challenge. The author used the verb wrestle, so I decided to expand and use it as an extended metaphor.
Teachers,
let’s coach and guide
our scholars
to actively wrestle
with problems,
encourage them from the sidelines
to pin down ideas
and demonstrate their strength.
They will appreciate
the match so much more
if they are in the ring
attacking the task
for themselves.
Be their “guide on the side.”
Heather, I love that you wrote from your homework and designed an extended metaphor to illustrate your learning. The wrestler seems like the perfect metaphor for a learner! (This would be a great exercise for students!)
Such wonderful advice in poetic form, Heather. Your metaphor is just perfect.
Bravo, Heather! This metaphor really works.
Hi Jessica. My first thought this morning when I saw the header for your prompt was, “Oh no?” First graders don’t do a lot of annotation. I loved your poem–especially the line, “appreciate the bones.” After reading your poem, my mind wandered back to yesterday where in our Writing Project Advanced Institute we were writing, reading about writing, talking about writing, and reading Liz Prather’s new book, The Confidence to Write. I pulled it out and started annotating a section in the chapter about the fear of the blank page called Breathe through it. Then I wandered through the annotations, following where my poet brain led. I did struggle with the title which came from a sentence early in the section that said something about using seemingly simple solutions to solve complex problems. Here’s where it stands right now.
Complexities of Simplicity
Breathe in
one, two, three, four
Breathe out
one, two, three, four
Feel the rhythm
the beat
drum drumming
refilling air sacs
lung pillows
calming, slowing,
pushing pounds
immoveable objects
pushing stress
filling
refilling
slowing
Breathe in
one, two, three, four
Breathe out
one, two, three, four
Count each breath
like steps
walking
through the sand
hear the tide
pushing in and out
dancing to the beat
of your heart
study says
breathing deep
increases productivity
by 47-62 minutes
Breathe in
one, two, three, four
Breathe out
one, two, three, four
Dive in
swim through
tap the rhythms
find the beat
immersed
in salty life blood
in salty sea water
emerge
with confidence
and breathe
Breathe in
one, two, three, four
Breathe out
one, two, three, four
@kd0602
Kim, beautiful poem and the rhythm that comes from the breathe in, breathe out, and the counting gives the whole poem a rhythm and life breath. It happens here and other places too:
Lovely!
This entire piece is genius Kim! It’s amazing how our brains do what our mouths say it can’t. I could feel the rhythm of each line, and thank you for the fact. I need to work on breathing deeper more often. These are my favorite lines:
“Dive in
swim through
tap the rhythms
find the beat
immersed
in salty life blood
in salty sea water
emerge
with confidence
and breathe”
You would think that something so involuntary we wouldn’t have to remind ourselves to do when we are facing challenges. I can’t swim, but if I did, I would want to come as confidently as this!
beautiful–this is really capturing an experience. I love the repetitions here and the ways your beats work into a kind of mesmerizing invitation.
Kim, I love how you took this weighty material and breathed rhythm and movement into it. Brava!
Jessica, thank you so much for your prompt today. I adored the opening question of your poem and how you ended with such a positive note “celebrate growth”. My poem is based on annotations from two young adult books of verse: Home Is Not a Country by Safia Elhillo and Me (Moth) by Amber McBride. Both books along with When We Make It by Elisabet Velasquez are outstanding, and I highly recommend them. The voices of each one are fascinating and the poetry is rich with imagery and emotion. Thank you, Sarah Donovan, for including these books in this month’s reading.
Between Two Worlds
I’m a ghost trapped between worlds
weaving unseen
fluttering within circling winds
through amber days and nights
gravitating to light
I fiercely fight
searching for my name
a language of my own
a place yellow warm
full of magic and mystery—
a place to call home
Barb Edler
24 April 2022
Barb, thank you for the book recs. I’ve bookmarked them for reading. Your poem pulls the reader in toward home. I love this image: “a place yellow warm /
full of magic and mystery—”
Barb- The tone of longing is strong. “Searching for my name”… the confounding of a person’s identity is real and disturbing as are “ghosts” that can’t find home and are “gravitating to light.” Beautiful images in these phrasings… though haunting. And “yellow warm” brings a comfort in that aptly ending “home” image. It’s comforting to know young folks are getting to read such evocative and beautiful literature. Well done!! Susie
Barb, I feel like this ghost is searching for their identity. The two worlds where they long to be in both, but can only choose one.
These lines: “I fiercely fight
searching for my name
a language of my own
a place yellow warm
full of magic and mystery—
a place to call home” resonated with me. We are always talking about home, but our definition of home is very different from what others’ definition of home is.We fight to find out where “home” is, whether physically or metaphorically.
I loved this poem. The second stanza especially spoke to me. I love the lines
“searching for my name
a language of my own”
Thanks for sharing!
Barb,
Your poem honors these verse novels. I read Moth a couple months ago and found it hauntingly beautiful. I need to read the other two books. I particularly like the lines “a language of my own..,/ a place to call home.” Isn’t language how we make a home in many ways?
Wow, this was challenging Jessica, but thank you for the prompt! I don’t have much experience with annotating, but I did attend a professional development session about it a few years back,pre-Covid. I ended up saving what I did and I will definitely be using the article again for my current students next year for a program I was selected to participate in. I will even keep my poem in case I need to use it as part of my lesson plans. I do love your poem; I wish I was this direct with my students. I take over instead of letting them do it themselves. I need to loosen the reigns.
This is my favorite stanza:
“I’m visualizing
a metaphor
of seeds:”
I have been working on poetry with my students and they are being introduced to many literary terms: alliteration, onomatopoeia, rhythm, etc…I hope to do more with them next year as this year has gotten away from me. I took a different route with my poem because it’s what I’m most familiar with.
Just Beginning to Annotate-Test Run
What can you find on Readworks.org?
Just about anything for art, music, science, and
the infamous social/emotional learning.
Today’s lesson: 5th Grade text,
Lexile 840,
Nonfiction.
Art on Ellis Island: Unframed.
Who on Earth would use an abandoned hospital
on Ellis Island
as an art exhibit?
JR, the French artist, was invited to,
in 2014.
Why not use a canvas
full of literal blood, sweat and tears,
walls haunted by images
of the past,
those looking
for freedom and life.
Annotate to find these
“3 Big Questions” from the text?
What surprised me?
What is something the author thought I already knew?
What changed, challenged, or confirmed what I already knew?
Surprised Much?
Ellis Island, immigration station, 60 years plus,
Folks leaving behind family and belongings.
The author, mind reader,
thought I knew
immigrants had to prove the possible
to enter the U.S.
While pushing aside their reasons
for leaving their once forever homes:
poverty, famine, war,
or cruel governments.
Changed, challenged, or confirmed
what I already knew?
Challenged?
Many of these people
shaped
the United States to this day.
Not up for debate.
Confirmed ?
Connecting past
to present, people relate
to the struggles
of those that came
before them.
Checkmate!
Take the time to annotate.
You may miss something
important
while you’re too busy
looking for answers to multiple
choice questions.
Dig deeper!
Jessica, Oh, I could definitely relate to so many details within your poem. Looking for literature or nonfiction pieces in ReadsWork and the annotation questions. Your end was absolutely the best. Yes, “Dig deeper!” Fantastic poem!
Thank you so much Barb! Looks like I need to dig deeper to work on my own annotating.
Jessica, you hit the nail on the head with the conclusion of this poem. Great job, and I do hope it becomes part of your lesson plan next year. So much truth here…
“You may miss something
important
while you’re too busy
looking for answers to multiple
choice questions.”
Thank you Denise. So many times I have said I was “going to do this or that”. I’m going to purposefully plan well this summer!
Jessica, thank you for the challenge for today, and as others have said, you’ve given a whole new world of possibilities for poems. In your poem, I was struck with these lines:
Such a rich message to give to someone as feedback on their writing.
My annotations were made on the back of a church bulletin today. It was the first time I’ve been to church in-person in 2022, and there was another first this morning–the first time in a lifetime that I heard a sermon on racial justice. This one by Brian Keepers at Trinity Reformed Church in Orange City, Iowa. This is a found poem from the notes I took.
“The line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes, nor between political parties either — but right through every human heart” ~Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn
[Color blessed quote is by Dr. Derwin L. Gray in How to Heal Our Racial Divide]
Racism and bigotry
Are they far from here?
No, they are here
Race is a construct
based on power
Forgive us our silence
God’s new creation
multiethnic
international
we are not color blind
we are color blessed
beautiful kaleidoscope
of humanity
God chose to create a
revolutionary gospel
of reconciliation
The love of Christ
compels us to act
mending
healing
restoring Shalom
(Can’t have peace without justice
Peace and justice are married.)
Love makes us courageous
We must become extremists of love
Racism isn’t far away from here,
But the living Jesus is not far
away either.
It won’t be easy
we have to do this
I know of no other Gospel
Denise, what an absolutely powerful poem and one that needs to be shared with a wide, wide audience. I was especially moved by the following lines:
Race is a construct
based on power
Forgive us our silence
Let us all be courageous to end this dehumanizing, evil construct. Kudos, Denise!
This is gorgeous, Denise; sounds like you witnessed a very powerful sermon/meditation. I am particularly awed by the line “Forgive us our silence.”
Wow! I love the setting and experience you chose to annotate because the result is powerful.
I love these lines: “we are not color blind
we are color blessed
beautiful kaleidoscope
of humanity”
Denise – This focus surely resonated with me today. We were annotating similar books. Race and caste are, indeed constructs in American psyche. I love the wisdom in your words. Susie
Denise, there are so many lines that I love and can definitely say “Amen” too! These deserve a hallelujah:
“we are not color blind
we are color blessed
beautiful kaleidoscope
of humanity”.
You need to patent that and put it on a shirt because it’s full of truth! Thank you for this!
This was incredibly powerful. This country’s churches need more sermons like this one.
I loved your line “we must become extremists of love”
What a better place we would live in if we all loved to the extreme.
Thank you for sharing this message, as someone who has had a turbulent relationship with some factions of the church these reminders of the good that can happen are nice to have.
[“Caste, … with its faithful servant race, is an x-factor in most any American equation,
and any answer one might ever come up with to address our current challenges is flawed without it.” Isabel Wilkerson, Caste: The Origins of Our Discontents]
PLEASE, MAY WE RECAST THE LIGHT
Caste
is
a state of mind;
slavery, sanctioned by the state
on full display, legal —
people = currency;
just think about that,
think about the faces
that believed not only that it was legal,
but that,
because the writers of this republic’s laws
wrote slavery into legality,
it was,
thereby,
right –
an anxiolytic
many continue to swallow
every morning
with conviction;
American “purity laws” —
and we thought the Nazis
founded the horrors —
we wrote
the playbook;
artificially drawn lines
of “whiteness”;
Andrew Jackson’s bridle reins
crafted from the flesh of indigenous people;
ritualized torture,
dehumanization,
chains,
boxed in,
fenced,
to corral human beings
as if strays in the alley;
group narcissism,
fascism,
appeal to fears,
2042
insecurities,
scare the most susceptible,
invent scenarios, facts,
till they shiver in their shoes,
then point a finger;
only when we are humbled
with our ordinariness,
will we begin to function
as a village, a global family member
and not behind a false patriarchal fog;
throw back the veil,
turn on the light,
let us
look like,
be
“we the people.”
by Susie Morice, April 24, 2022©
Susie, wow, you have me sold on reading this book. Your poem is rich with the horrors of slavery. I loved your title and the encouraging voice to really look at the systems that have justified brutality. There’s nothing I would love more than a village of people standing together, breaking through the “ false patriarchal fog” to look like “we the people”. Bang! Your words are explosive and righteous. Thank you for sharing such an amazing poem. You rock!
Susie, my to-read list is growing in leaps today. Wow, what details of history you have added here that turn the stomach. We have been duped, so yes a million times to your:
Susie, I have the book (TBR) and I will not let the summer get by me without reading it. First, these lines remind me of how we teach students that just because it is written doesn’t make it true or right. Even the little ones get it! Why couldn’t our leaders?
Then you nailed it…
And such a punch of necessary change at the end! Excellent poem, my friend!
?
Susie,
Wilkerson’s book is everything we must acknowledge about this country if we are to self-actualize as you so beautifully lay out in those final lines. This truth must be spoken and claimed:
“American “purity laws” —
and we thought the Nazis
founded the horrors —
we wrote
the playbook;”
One could argue there’d be no Hitler w/ out our original sin.
Ken and I spent the part two days on the Navajo Nation, and we as a country should be shamed for what we did and don’t do. 75% of Navajo have no electricity. Many live primitive lives, despite a fvcking coal powered plant that ran for decades. The Navajo didn’t get that power. Thankfully Biden decommissioned it after Orangey tried to keep it running and polluting the air. Those who claim there is no white privilege should have to live as Native Americans do. They might change their minds pretty quickly. Rant over. Love the poem and your fierce voice.
I’ve been annotating books more because I like the idea of future generations finding my books and reading the word I’ve written in them. It’s fun to think of my marginalia (the official term for notes, doodles, and other comments written into books) preserved and read by people unknown. I never would have thought of making it into poetry…so here we go!
This is how… By Erica Johnson
People’s words can make
you doubt your own memories.
I have so many questions,
but why does it matter?
I guess the friends don’t know,
they aren’t friends,
if they hurt you.
Weirdos are better.
Marginalia – oh how I love that word. There was a time that I couldn’t write on a page or margin thinking I was somehow harming the book. No longer. And to think that our markings has a name – marginalia – and could now be thought of as poetry oh sweet Sunday!
And yes – weirdos are better!
I love reading marginalia, and I want to do more of it.
I love your opening two lines.
Erica, I like that idea of future generations reading my marginalia. Ha! I’m going to have to start writing more legibly. There is some definite truth here…
“People’s words can make you doubt your own memories” I feel like that line will stay with me. I love to read other’s annotations (more than I like annotating myself)–some people leave the most interesting marginalia!
I love the idea of some total stranger picking up a book from a used book store and finding your marginalia. I was at a talk with a textile artist the other day who spoke on the fact that “fabric has memory” and I love that your books will also have memory.
You have inspired me to start marking up my books. I have quite a few verse novels that I marked up and they are in my classroom library. Students who have read say that my notes helped them make better sense of the text. So, I guess I should have taken that as a sign, But you have inspired me. And I love the term marginalia.
Jessica, this was truly a challenge! I love to write in margins and I have never thought about my annotations being poetry; you’ve opened a whole new world of possibility.
Yesterday, I listened to Poetry Unbound which offered a poem by Kyle Carrera Lopez entitled “Ode to the Crop Top” and this mesmerizing listen (with annotations!) led me here, today:
I am riveted
I am riveted
so beautiful I can’t look away
subtle power of joyous resistance
a stranger’s mocking
derision
and your response
confidence
continued celebration
courageously calling out
through poetry
and you break the spell
own your beauty
playfully
rhythmically
fashioning words
a tiny little poem
about a tiny little bit of clothing
dared to be worn by a man
dressing up for a fun night out
in the half-set sun
love your words ‘half-set sun’
I feel the warmth and party that the evening invites
to wear what we like
seems a very basic ordinary simple right
wise words with
so much white space centering every line
I see how this creates a tank top visually
I wonder if it also means let’s meet in the middle
center stage
claim the space
stop the hate stop the hate stop the hate
I am riveted
so beautiful I won’t look away
Maureen, your poem is mesmerizing. The words literally flow and dance off the page. I love how you show what the poem was about that you listened to and how you show that even the things that we wear can cause derision from others. I love the way your straight forward, honest voice captured the imagery the poet shared but then led your readers to an even deeper message of “stop the hate”. The repetition here adds power. I especially love your end “I am riveted
so beautiful I won’t look away” Magnificent poem!
Maureen, I am riveted by your poem. The repetition of “I am riveted” and “stop the hate” is powerful. (I want to remember to use repetition more.) These lines sound extra good on the lips:
Maureen, I listened to Ode to the Crop Top yesterday too! It hit me hard. One of these days I will write a poem about the stares my son endured as a child from the scars on his tummy.
Again, why can’t we just BE! It’s an ordinary and simple right, right?
This warms my heart!
I love everything about this! Thank you! Now I think I should consider annotating when I listen to Poetry Unbound.
❣️
Maureen,
Im awestruck by this poem. It is genius!!! This should be every woman’s response when someone tries to police her clothing:
“subtle power of joyous resistance
a stranger’s mocking
derision
and your response
confidence
continued celebration
courageously calling out
through poetry”
Beaho! The power of words to reclaim power is right there! Love the repetition of “I am riveted,” Your use of white space is masterful. I could go on, but will end w/ this: You have crafted an amazing poem.
Jessica,
Your words gave me so much to contemplate:
I know how that would relate to a written piece but it’s so pertinent to life! ?
You challenged me this morning and it was FUN! I am so thankful I had a Sunday morning for this prompt as I knew I wanted to give it the time it deserved. I used Jacqueline Woodson’s poem the fabric store from Brown Girl Dreaming. Special thanks to Kevin for leading me in the right direction.
When They Don’t See Us
I remember all the places
Grandma took us
when we were kids
Downtown Cafeteria and
the corner store
for lemon heads on Fridays
When Grandma was young
those stores sent her
to the back door
She never ate inside
the Downtown Cafeteria
COLORED NOT ALLOWED
Today we can eat
And shop and walk
in the front entrance
But at Ruby’s Diner, Mommie fussed
when the waitresses
tried seating us by the kitchen
We passed four
empty tables
“We’ll take that one up front.”
What if we could be
Colored, Negro, Black or Brown
and be seen and loved?
© Stacey L. Joy, 4/24/22
Stacey!
I first read the image you attached, and I am so glad you did attach that reading experience for us to read/observe/witness. The talking back to/through, the interpretation offers powerful insight to your agency as a reader. I think “do all teachers offer such space for their students?”
Then, I read your poem, and this is a whole other level, dimension of meaning making that is, again, yours. The response to and through Woodson’s memoir into the speaker’s Grandma’s — I wonder if the voice is yours or your mother’s or both or neither or all. The “we” is a pronoun of shared experience both personal and collective at once not asking that final question but declaring a call to see and love.
I am holding onto the “what if,” carrying this with me, knowing we are still in Woodson’s dreaming.
Thank you for your poem and glimpse into your poetic process!
Sarah
Stacey, this is gorgeous! Wow! You walk us through Jacqueline Woodson’s poem while simultaneously sharing your own/your family’s experience – showing the universality of this pain, how Ms. Woodson’s writing is so profound and insightful. What a powerful concluding stanza/question. Thank you for this; your poem is a treasure.
Thank you for showing your process. Your poem is amazing.
Stacey — You selected such a good book to annotate and then write about today. It hits so hard to see the “passed four/empty tables”… the whole arrangement of dividing people is brutal to swallow…so damned wrong…and so visual here. This country has so far to go … that these images are still real in some places in this country just makes me want to scream. The “What if…” is seemingly so simple…and here we are with hundreds of years and insane separations raging on. I want the “what ifs” to be hard core actions for change. Woodson’s book is wonderful. Thank you. Susie
Stacey, wow, you’ve captured so many images and emotions here. The past and present are not that distant in your poem, and the mother’s fussing in the poem is just. Your final stanza carries a heavy question “and be seen and loved?” Powerful and heart-wrenching poem. Beautiful!
Thank you for attaching your annotations. It was wonderful to see the process that led to your powerful poem.
Stacey, your rich annotations on the passage from Brown Girl Dreaming has created a beautiful kaleidoscope of thoughts and feelings across generations. Wow. I am learning so much today.
Yes to this…in any generation, but now today a necessity.
Jessica, welcome to Verselove. I so appreciate this invitation to look for annotations and for your Chicago and Michigan connections, which I know resonate with me and other midwesterners here. And I look forward to reading more of your poetry in these final days of Verselove. Today, I uncovered annotations that have been waiting for me:
Sea-Drift on Yellowed Pages
My book shelf helps me carry him
in Leaves of Grass, The Selected…
Samuel Taylor Coleridge, The Portable
Steinbeck.
But only in “Sea-Drift” does his script
speak to Whitman & Sarah within:
“The white arms out in the breakers tirelessly tossing”
one of great lines he writes
feeling the loneliness of the bird he notes
“Soft! let me just murmur,
And do you wait a moment you husky-nois’d sea…
But not altogether still, for then she might not come immediately to me”
the cry for the lost love to return he speaks
from somewhere & everywhere and both he hopes
“And again death, death, death, death,”
repetition as do many waves he sees
following each other
in to shore! he bellows
I know he read through page 203
his last words in blue pen:
and life, there is a sweet smile for
the approaching Last Sleep.
I know not if he read the rest in
“Sea Adrift” because his script
sleeps, too, though I do know
his poetic conversation lives on
here, with me. With you.
http://www.ethicalela.com/wp-content/uploads/2022/04/20220424_125520.mp4
I so love “Whitman & Sarah”! What an extraordinary find/reveal – to read through this book of poetry that was obviously much loved by someone you love…you must feel his presence in every page, reading those annotations. Yes,
Sarah, your words carry such magic. I feel the romantic embrace of nature, the flowing water, the movement of being adrift. I am in awe of how you captured not only words but a the rhythm and flow and passion of the text. Loved your line ““Soft! let me just murmur,”. Your poetic conversation is rich and inviting. Sensational poem! Thank you!
I love the way you have this conversation with Whitman and the annotator and Sarah. Very clever use of punctuation and font to show the participants in the conversation. (The movie was a bonus, Sarah!)
Thanks for sharing Jessica. As educators we need to uplift our students and be sensitive to the feedback we provide for them.
Feedback
This is amazing!
Your choice of words and creativity invites readers to read more.
Curiosity, Excitement, ah ha moments
Yes these are all present in students work.
As we aim to help improve skills
Be kind, caring, and sensitive
Be their allies as we listen to their conversations and read their writings
Can you elaborate some more
Is there another way you can word this sentence
View students as co-constructor in the learning
Positive comments motivates
Critical comments make us bloom as learners!
Dee, so many wise pieces of advice herein; I appreciate the tenderness and care you show to students. I really believe “View students as co-constructor in the learning” – they will soar with such respect.
I love all the positive words in this feedback poem. This is what I love about collaborating with students and celebrating the beauty in their work. Great poem.
Dee, I like this list of annotations and good advice for giving feedback. I’m curious about your last line. Can you elaborate a bit for me? I tend to think the opposite, but maybe I’m reading it wrong. I love that word “co-constructor” Yes!
Student Annotations on A Doll’s House by Henrik Ibsen
I love reading
my students’
annotations
on the literature
we read,
seeing their
thinking
throughout.
They range
from surprise
(“AHHHHHH”)
to disgust
(“Ewwwww”)
to laughter
(“hehehehe”)
to dismay
(“Oh. No.”)
to incredulity
(“Excuse me ?!?!?!”).
They connect
(“If I found out
my boyfriend
ever said that
to another
person I would
break up with
him.”) and question
(“What sort of weird
‘Friendship’ do
they have?”).
They make me
laugh (“Why are
we talking about
a squirrel? Is
this a real squirrel?”)
(“literally puking in
my mouth”)
(“This is literally
how I talk to my
dog.”) and
always make
me marvel
at how astute
my students are:
(“#girlboss”)
(“Women are
not delicate”)
(“No means NO”)
(“Men and their
pride :(“ )
(“OOF”).
________________________________________________
Thank you, Jessica, for your prompt and mentor poem! I can definitely see this being a fun assignment in class. And I think your note is true: “don’t be afraid / to celebrate growth.”
Oh man, your students’ annotations sound like my own at times. Well, I guess only the first stanza LOL! I wish my students would annotate like this. I need to be better. Love this!
BTW I NEED those clear post-it notes! 🙂
Scott,
The punctuation is so powerful here and a lesson in the ways we can use the marks to signal the many ways we annotate in script and thought. I am so curious about the specific passages (want to re-read that book) and yet don’t really need to know because their “astute” proclamations allow me to infer!
I think the greatest insight here is “They connect.”
Peace,
Sarah
Scott, the things students say and write are why I taught. And I taught “A Doll’s House” several times throughout my career. Putting the student comments in parenthesis gives me a sense of the discussions you’ve had w/ students. I’m imagining them peppering comments to you and building to a feminist crescendo. Good job focusing on a specific text, too.
Scott, I truly enjoyed getting this glimpse of youthful thinking!! I so love it!! Great annotations, clever poem!
Scott — Student annotations… I loved each of these. The honesty of a kid’s reaction to text is just a metacognitive picnic. It’s a perfect lesson in “Voice” to use annotations this way. Bravo! Susie
Scott, I was completely captured by your student voices and love how you were able to capture them so well; to show their personalities through their comments. Your end I thought was the best part, showing how “astute” they are and that final (“OOF”). Sensational!
Scott, what a super collection of your students’ annotations. They definitely sound like teens! The “puking in my mouth” comment is funny, and I love the last stanza…
“always make
me marvel
at how astute
my students are…”
Scott–I love this found poem of your students’ annotations! I especially enjoy the categories, they make me laugh, they connect, always make me marvel (that’s my favorite!). Great piece!
Scott, as I was scrolling and starting reading this poem, I had missed that it was yours. I honestly could tell as I reached the end. That’s certainly indicate of your voice.
This is filled with so many great teenager-isms. Love it.
? BOOM!!! ?
Need I say more?
????????
Jessica, Thank you for inspiring us this morning with this new to me found poem. You reminded that poetry CAN be found any where! With that said I am hanging on to your words: Appreciate the bones, but don’t be afraid to celebrate growth.
My draft comes from the margins of Ellin Keene’s Engaging Children.
Find your heart’s home
A place of peace
Yes!
My heart’s home
Traveling
Exploring
Learning
Discovering
Sunny day in the studio
Music playing in background
Nothing to rush back to
Loss of time
Engrossed in making
Senses awake
Light feeling
Wanting to do it again
for friends
Peaceful
Joyful
Alive
Looking at things
in a new way
Oh boy! Oh boy!
Surprise
Christina — “Looking at things/in a new way” — this is so perfect and important.
Finding your hearts home in so many places. Looking at things in a new way…childlike not childish.
Christine,
I am struck by this gift of reading Keene and reading your reading of Keene while reading your poetry of the reading of a reading for us, for me. This is the essences of Rosenblatt’s transactional reading theory living in this beautiful space. Thank you for allowing these words their own lines to pop out at me to carry today.
Peaceful
Joyful
Alive
Peace,
Sarah
My goodness, if all classrooms could be created with echoes of your teaching heart described here, what joyful learning would result! Love this thinking, “Find your heart’s home.” Beautiful!
What a cool prompt, Jessica! Couldn’t write just one. I remembered a conversation I had with my 7th graders about annotating (before I was made to move to 8th grade). That’s the first poem.
Then I pulled out two old books that have massive amounts of annotations. The Unbearable Lightness of Being – annotated in college sometime (2006-2010) and The Third Plate annotated in 2015. Italics are my annotations / quotes are lines from novels.
On Annotating
I tell them:
Annotate!
Write in the book!
Look at my book.
I have written in it.
But they don’t like writing in books.
You want us to vandalize books?!?!
YES! Vandalize books!
It’s good.
Someone mentions a flashback in the novel.
And I tell them:
Here’s a “memory moment” for you
imagine 20 years from now
you skim your bookshelf
and find Pax.
You look in it and see what you
underlined and wrote
in
the
margins
on October 18, 2021.
Maybe you will remember
how Ms. (what was her name?)
talked to you about the relationship
between a boy and his fox
and “two but not two”.
_____________________________
Stars and Thoughts
So many stars.
Stars mean love to me.
I love this word,
this line,
this paragraph,
this.
Even if
it hurts.
you want what you don’t have
i am what i hate
wanting to be sad
chance creates fate
“Co-incidence”
*signs*
Feelings change
Mixed feelings
Only feelings
Leaving feeling not good enough
Compassion for strangers
“When do you start raising a child?”
No intimacy —> ignorance —> loss
“You are what you eat eats, too.”
“Get big or get out”
So depressing
Bigger isn’t always better
Nature couldn’t keep up with
wealthy,
indulgent,
want, want, want
human demand
“Protein paradox”
“White meat supremacy”
Fish are not supposed to eat chicken
WTH
But its cheap
Feeding farm raised fish real fish
What’s the point?
NATURE IS NOT A MACHINE
MIND FUCKING BLOWN
[framing]
Not knowing
if all this means the world
or nothing at all.
Stars, stars, and more of those stars…
These are both wonderful, Angie. Just wonderful.
Angie — “Not knowing/if all this means the world/or nothing at all” — just love this stanza. I feel like we all fall into that hole sometimes, wondering if any of what we do matters.
Angie, these are great! I love the first stanza (and how it feeds into your second stanza) in your second poem: “So many stars. / Stars mean love to me. / I love this word. / this line, / this paragraph, / this. / Even if / it hurts.” Like you, I am an unrepentant “marker of texts” and I find I will often circle, double underline, add exclamation points, what have you to moments in a text that I then just write “this” or “I love this” next to. (I’ve just recently procured these clear post-it notes that I can stick in my books and write on with Sharpie: They are life-changing!)
Wow. Both poems show the absolute essence of annotating. Pure genius!
Angie — Fascinating! I loved the first On Annotating because I scrawl all through every book I read… I totally vandalize books! 🙂 I smiled at all sorts of lines in the 2nd piece…but really stopped and re-thought “white meat supremacy”…doggone good phrase! Thank you. Susie
Thank you, Jessica for this prompt. I fell in love with annotation when I taught Charlotte’s Web. I poured over its book of annotations – like secrets held for only me. I loved sharing tidbits I learned with students, and they began seeing annotation as a treasure hunt.
I am currently reading, French Dirt by Richard Goodman, and I marvel at his turn of phrase, the words he chooses to describe his year as a gardener in France – how he wrangles and wrestles the earth to create something beautiful. I have re-arranged some of his words that I had underlined, wanting to hold them in my mind and heart.
My Garden of Eden
Everything is permitted,
Nothing is forbidden.
From this sanctuary of weeds,
Under a commonwealth of stars,
The moon led me
To this luscious Garden of Eden.
I made a number
Of small green choices.
They germinated.
They grew.
They flowered like children.
They began to bloom –
Pinkish-yellow buds
Detonated on each branch
Blossom to blossom
Nosing in the scent like a bee,
I was dirty.
I was tired.
I was sweaty.
I was happy.
UGH! your poem makes me 1. want to read this and 2. do what he is doing. Such a lovely found poem! Thank you for sharing the novel and poem.
“Germinated”, “Detonated” I love the verbs you have chosen and the ending is so satisfying as it really captures the hard work and love that goes into tending to a garden: ” I was dirty/I was tired/I was sweaty/I was happy.”
Hi Word Dancer, thank you for sharing. Your poem made me think of nature and my own backyard garden. It takes work to get those plants to grow but the effort is worth it to sit back and enjoy the beautiful landscape and reap the vegetables.
A glorious found poem, Joanne, in language and images. What an intriguing book, written by someone “wrestling the earth to create something beautiful”! This poem certainly is.
“I made a number of snap green choices.” Is so understated and profound! The contrast of the detonating buds a few lines later is powerful. And “flowering like children” really speaks to me too. Lovely poem.
*small (darn you, phone keyboard)
I love the twist of a positive garden of Eden and how you managed to make things in grow. My favorite is the end, how all of this hard work leads to happiness. Thanks for sharing!
Discovering all kinds of doors to creativity! Love you poem, Jessica, and the wonderful advice in the last stanza, I am going to remember that! Thank you!
#57, pg.497
When you returned,
famous now,
complexion cleared,
hair perfectly coiffed,
nails trim and polished,
the sparkly girls
marveled
at your understated poise,
your quiet dignity,
the undetected talent
that brought you back
to your Alma Mater
for an honorary degree.
How could that be,
they wondered?
How could a quiet,
unattractive
nobody,
change the world?
How lucky I am, to have met you
through books,
through words that sparkled
like sunshine glints on the ocean
you loved;
through fragments and phrases
defending tiny trembling creatures,
and courage that defied
stereotypes and societal expectations.
Beauty lurks unnoticed
in our mirrors,
beneath the sea,
and everywhere around us.
You taught me that, Rachel,
and I am ever grateful.
And I am grateful you craft as you do, Ann.
Love the lilt and rhythm of this gratitude poem, Ann. I appreciate a good appreciation! This line alone would be enough of a prompt for all of us, I should think, “How lucky I am, to have met you / through books,” – ! Don’t literary folk all have our ‘influencers’ from books or any story we encounter (movies, video games). The characters and their lives guide us in our own reality – and that is indeed the greatest beauty of literature. How many lives has reading saved? Made better? As countless as the grains of sand, I’m sure. Beautiful rendering here today!
Here are some of my more positive annotations when I graded memoir papers.
To my LIT 313 undergrads:
Love the diamond imagery
I can relate
Wow
Great
What an accomplishment
You’re so ambitious
I really enjoyed reading this and
Found your descriptions very clear
I understand how you crafted this
Thank you for sharing your
Amazing story
Congratulations on persevering
You clearly delineate your process here
Your content is strong, well-written
You go into a lot of detail and
Tell your story
You dig deep
You are a writer
I love what you have decided to bold. There’s something about “diamond imagery” that is so satisfying and “you are a writer” – what a great end line.
I love this poem. It reminds me of the power of a teacher to encourage and cultivate young minds. The simplicity of the last two lines is a mantra for all of us on days when words don’t come ~ You dig deep. You are a writer. Beautiful!
H Jennifer, I like all the positivity coming from your poem. Comments like these will surely motivate students.
Jessica, It’ shard to believe it is Day 24 already. Phew. And I’ve never written a poem based on the annotations taken in a book (LOVE IT)(I can spend the rest of my life writing poems just like this). Your lines,
stood out the most, as well as, “Appreciate the bones.” Found poems from annotations. Definitely winning me over on a Sunday morning!
One Way to Cultivate a Genius
in appreciation of Gholdy, always
~b.r.crandall
We were Writing Our Lives,
scripting dialogue in another room,
when he put pen to notebook,
wand to mind (This was Cedric’s magic)
and walked in his shoes
from Degahaley
to Kakuma
to Syracuse.
Alfred’s advice,
“Don’t go ahistorical”
(this, before I learned
the importance of
the Gholdy-star).
For Europeans, writing remained reason,
and they guarded Gates well –
the ethnic notions have always been global,
fired deep into the bricks
of foundations, especially in schools.
Freedom is just
an empty name,
a mockery,
if access
& tools
are locked
in the
shed.
Poetry is liberation, though.
Pens to fight back —
to write a better humanity for us all.
Who we are
How others see us
Who we desire to be
it’s never been the kids…
it’s always been the schools
deficit constructions catalogued
by zip-codes, politicians
& book-banning school boards.
Good teachers know
to reshape curriculum
to meet the needs of kid,
rather that mutate kids
to meet the needs of curriculum.
The pedagogies are urgent, indeed.
Yet, we have failed a nation
that measures Whiteness
in tanning booths
on NYS tests…
an organic nature of bias
is in the food we feed them,
layering deficits on regents
rather than passing on knowledge
with ubuntu and skills for life,
(muscle is built
with theory
for the critical race
of being human).
We are the conduit for emancipation
the cobblers who quench thirst when enabling texts
that fit them in the right shoe.
I have lots of favorite lines here Bryan. I don’t know how to do the giant quotes, but you’ve said everything I’ve wished to say about the deficits in our educational system and our need for ubuntu and skills for life. I love your last three lines, but mostly I love these three: Poetry is liberation.. pens to fight back…to write a better humanity for all of us. So perfect Bryan. So absolutely perfect.
Bryan, This is wonderful, per yuzh (that’s my attempt at truncating “usual” to sound more hip and “with it” — do the kids still say “with it” these days?) I loved so much of this, but my favorite moments are in stanza 4…5…7…8…ok, I take that back, you have cool moments in all of them. And you really stuck the landing (I went with a gymnastics metaphor instead of a “shoe” one — because they both involve…feet (?)) with your last stanza: “We are the conduit for emancipation / the cobblers who quench thirst when enabling texts / that fit them in the right shoe.” Thanks for this!
wow! and wow! thanks for sharing such a powerful poem. Writing is indeed a pathway for liberation. Schools need to begin to place students at the forefront of education. All too often we teach the curriculum and forget the human side. I can’t wait for the system to CHANGE.
Bryan – the bits about the organic nature of bias and layering deficits – well, they’re anything but bits, they’re whole-hollowed out mountains where children have been tossed – let me just say how much I love your lines on poetry being liberation, with pens to fight back. Speak it, sing it! – so much power in this poem.
Hey Bryan,
This is another powerhouse poem! I love the allusions that you weave into this. You capture so much meaning beyond the text in your words.
OMGosh. Another totally fun and eye-opening prompt. Thank you, Jessica! I don’t need to go far to find a marked-up book in this house! I just wish I could also include all the doodles that end up in the magins. : )
So Noted: A Short History of Myth by Karen Armstrong
Imagination
religion, myth, science
invention, technology
What is opting out?
reading? movies?
cross the threshold
our world
world of myth
truth in myth
deeper meaning
transcendence
We have separated ourselves from myth
the mythology of the first:
President
Astronaut
Teacher
becomes the archetype
it was better back then
we long for it
return in daily lives
to the Golden Age
It was never meant to be historical
Why gods die
animals are superior
dealing with killing the very animals they respected
Why we hate the ruthless hunter
Myth came into being
Myth as transformative
Not just for entertainment
at death, just one more stage
what is the significance of a tree
I love the exploration Of myth and mythology in this. So many gems in these lines. The “why we hate the ruthless hunter” stanza is my favorite, followed closely by the mythology of firsts. This poem says so much in what it leaves open to the reader!
Denise, I love what you said about not needed to go far to find a marked-up book. I’m not in a place where I could do that today, but I just felt the warmth of your full library annotated and doodled books. You captured some good true here about mythology and the false gods myths become.
Jessica, what a fun and original spin on poetry writing. It’s the perfect challenge to offer students. I’m struck by how your title “Past Tense Would Work Better Here” and the question “Was there emptiness before?” play with each other and against each other. I spent some time with Margaret Atwood this morning.
This is a Poem of Self
It is difficult to see women
buried as they are
under
beneath
below
all that they do;
they struggle to climb out
to gain ground on what ought to be
a gentle slope
(undefined or infinite)
planting a house
along the way.
But this is small
by comparison.
(Why do we know more about
what surrounds them
than we do about them?
Peering through the glass ceiling
from above
I could save you
but it is easier to let you drown
slowly
while I watch.)
Jennifer: Wow. A powerful piece! Those last three stanzas. Loved the wisdom of:
”Why do we know more about/What surrounds them/ Than we do about them?”
wow, what lovely and powerful, thought-provoking lines throughout. The last two stanzas are haunting…
Jennifer,
Im sure every woman here will see themselves in your poem, both in our own burial beneath the patriarchy and in our desire to rescue other women from it. Whew, so many thoughts swirling in my mind. For me your words magnify the way the world annotates women and the way some women stand on the shore watching and assisting the structures pushing us under. The parenthetical section magnifies this for me.
Jennifer, this is powerful and beautiful and incredibly sad (in its truth)! I can see this pairing nicely with Marge Piercy’s “A Work of Artifice” (or even her “Barbie Doll”) while discussing Nora or Medea or Ophelia or Sonia or Linda or ….the list goes on…sadly…of subjugated women in my AP curriculum. Could I use your poem? (to help fight the good fight against the effing patriarchy!)
Thank you, Scott. And of course! I hope it helps, though experience shouts otherwise (ought to be a gentle slope) is a found line – This is a Photograph of Me (Atwood).
Took us right by the throat. Riding along with you and agreeing. Then those last 4 lines. Devastating!
Jennifer, would you believe I have an antique locket given to me at age 15 by my grandmother, which was given to her at age 15 in 1930… on this locket is the etching of a house, gentle slopes, some other things I can’t make out… between you and Atwood, so help me, I am looking at for where the hidden woman lies, as I don’t see a lake. Talk about metaphor… absolutely beautiful found poem with its perspective and chilling truths; thank you.
Hmmm… I believe Atwood has a very interesting family tree so maybe something magical is afoot!
Jennifer, what a compelling poem today – – the plight and struggles of women and that management of expectations piece that is superimposed by society. This stuck with me:
(Why do we know more about
what surrounds them
than we do about them?
I remember at the very beginning of my teaching career, I had a very wise principal who once told parents, “we teach about religion, but we never teach religion,” when a parent complained. This has stayed with me for years – teaching about something and teaching something – or knowing about someone and knowing someone – are two very different ideas, and I love how you made this work so well right here.
That definitely got intense. I especially loved those last three stanzas — so much happening in this poem and yet that in particular stood out to me and made me frustrated with the predicament of women!
Holy Moses, Jennifer! This is brilliant. The images of women being un-seen are powerful and raw… “Planting a house/along the way”…dang…so poetic, so image-rich….and the “glass ceiling”…the idea of looking through that and down on the women struggling, well, that is just killa good poetry right there! And in good Atwood form…the “let you drown/slowly/while I watch” is a cautionary tale. Wow! Really a moving poem. Wowwow! Susie
Jennifer, this is haunting and sad, but so much truth too.
“Peering through the glass ceiling
from above”
and just watching…Very powerful.
Jessica, this is a unique idea for a poem. I’m envisioning many ways teachers and students can have fun w/ it. I like asking questions in the margins as you have in your poem. Love the way that leads to the emphasis on growth.
Im away from home and don’t have access to books or papers I’ve annotated, so I wrote about something I emphasized with AP Lit & Comp students. I do see my ironic usage.
Active > Passive
Passive voice is my pet peeve.
Think about who or what
does the work.
Consider who or what
acts upon the verb.
Active voice takes
responsibility
for the verb doing.
Passive voice abdicates
responsibility
the way a politician
points
a finger
dangles
words
places
blame.
In general—
active needs
less ink
fewer key strokes
less white space.
Active lifts
while
passive diminishes
you
&
your
words.
Active > than passive.
—Glenda Funk
April 24, 2022
Great poem and fantastic use of the annotated note format
Kevin
Glenda, you make great points
here with active voice! Writers who change the world don’t do it passively! I love the way you use the finger-blaming politicians as an illustrative example, and the idea of lifting words – not diminishing them
Glenda, Glenda, Glenda! I need to borrow this poem when I’m talking active/passive with students (may I?). The shifting back and forth in word placement at the center of the poem might just be my favorite – as if the politician is wagging their finger in an unh-unh-unh way or can’t quite decide where to place the blame (it could be anyone, whoever is within reach). I believe I will always think of politicians diminishing passively, everything and everyone, from now on.
Jennifer,
Yes, of course, feel free to share the poem w/ students, and thank you for your kind words.
Glenda,
I love this! Can I use this poem while I am reviewing active and passive tomorrow?
Susan, yes. Feel free to use the poem, and thank you!
PERFECT (and it’s not even pet-peeves day). This was written from a soul who has carried forth immense meditation while contemplating its importance.
Glenda, clever decisions were made when crafting this poem! (And your proactive “ironic usage” disclaimer was enjoyable to read.)…ok, I was going to try and write this whole comment in the passive voice, but it just gets too awkward and unwieldy, and as you note in your wonderful poem, it only serves to “[diminish] / you / & / your / words.” (And I don’t want to do that!) This was a lot of fun!
Glenda, I absolutely adore the comparison of passive voice to a politician’s dodging of responsibility – just fabulous!! This is excellent. I learned a lot!!!
Your poem is so powerful, Glenda. It has such “clean bones,” such straightforward comparisons: Active voice takes responsibility while passive abdicates.. active lifts while passive diminishes (and obfuscates audience by wrapping words in layers of opaqueness).
Glenda,
this poem will be read in class tomorrow. (Thinking about having my students memorize it!)
Dave,
I’m honored. Thank you. And I see what you did there w/ “will be read.” Well played!
Whoa! Glenda, a fantastic lesson on passive voice! I LOVE that. You have really hammered this baby with a big nail. Every writing teacher could use your poem for a primer on Passive vs Active Voice. In fact, send this puppy to NCTE for the EJ! Kickass poem! Susie
“Active lifts while passive diminishes.” Yes, indeed. This alone shows that active is greater than passive. Well done!
Jessica, I feel like annotation poetry might keep me busy – and sustained – for days, weeks, infinity and beyond… those notes in your verse apply to writing and to life itself (is this not why we write?). Magnificent springboard, compelling poem – for are we not part of all we have read? Does not all we have read become part of us-?
My annotations come from an eclectic mix: Culturally Responsive Teaching and the Brain (Zaretta Hammond), The Power of Moments (Chip and Dan Heath), The Forgotten Beasts of Eld (Patricia A. McKillip), and John 16.
Might I violate the expectation
of an experience
with the right amount of tension
keeping the rubber band taut
bearing in mind that
there must be trust enough
for productive struggle
risking vulnerability
even as a disciple unprepared
for the terribleness
of what is to come
imagine tapping inner power
to call creatures with ancient magic
unto myself
while tasting
the freewheeling thoughts
of birds
Fran, I love what you’ve done here using a variety of texts. We have similar reading taste – the only one I have not also read is the Beasts book. The others – all so powerful! That ancient magic tapping is such a hopeful thought, to be able to have those powers in these modern days, just for the calling forth and using it on something that could change the world like writing can!
“… tasting
the freewheeling thoughts
of birds”
Wow. Love that phrasing
Kevin
Fran, you work magic with your poetry. I found it in the “ancient magic” of inner power calling creatures and in the taste of “freewheeling thoughts of birds” – in this soaring over, in the freedom in flight, of which we will only have a taste, at least without the magic.
Love these lines, Fran….
Especially love the last stanza. Will stay with me today. Thank you, Fran!
while tasting
the freewheeling thoughts
of birds
Fran,
You’ve knitted an annotated quilt w/ your thoughts and words this morning. This is the approach I would love to have taken w/ today’s prompt. Maybe later. For now, I’ll say I live the bible verse juxtaposed w/ the pedagogy.
Jessica, thank you for hosting us today! Fabulous prompt – and one that I can see as being so helpful for teaching students who don’t know how to talk to the text to do so by showing them and modeling the process! I like how you also asked questions – was there emptiness before sticks with me.
The Postcard Project
In Malaprop’s Bookstore
Asheville
I saw it.
The Postcard Project.
52 Weeks of Art Journaling
Via snail mail.
Perfect for my grandkids,
I thought,
Thumbing through.
Send a card weekly
and ask them
to create their own art
then ask their mama
to send me a picture
of their work.
Perfect.
I started with
A good deed.
“Nana filled the birdfeeders
In the garden,” I wrote.
“What good deed
did you do this week?”
I can’t wait to hear!
For this week, I might pick
On My Plate –
What did you eat today?
I’ll draw a tomato sandwich.
I wonder what the babies
Are eating.
They love Nutella.
Or maybe it’s our favorite
Music or song. I can draw
Abba singing
Slipping Through My Fingers
Knowing it’s for real.
I wonder what they are
Dancing to these days.
Maybe Five Little Speckled Frogs,
Eating the most delicious bugs.
Maybe I’ll draw a still life
of my Aleve bottle.
So many choices in
The Postcard Project.
Plenty to keep Nana writing,
Plenty to keep the babies
Writing back.
Postcard projects like this are magical (I am part of one with teachers around the world, via CLMOOC, and having handwritten connections in the days of digital is special).
Kevin
Kim, what a fabulous correspondence and more so, connection – “plenty to keep Nana writing and the babies writing back” – what a wondrous, magical way to start their noticings of the world and responding to it so positively and creatively. How blessed they are with their artistic, writerly, free-spirit Nana! Here we see the ties that bind being created before our eyes; they are eternal. My grandmother used to write letters to me and included stamps so I could write back. I am celebrating those ABBA songs and tomato sandwiches…and chuckling over that still life of the Aleve bottle!
Thank you, Fran! Another common thread – I write and include stamps, taking away the “I didn’t have a stamp” excuse! I need to gather all of the letters we have exchanged and look for those ways of celebrating. I think you’ve just given me a new monthly theme for later this year! Thanks!
PS – forgot to say I love Malaprops in Asheville; it’s a must on every visit.
Kim, everything about this is delightful – the concept of the postcard project, the takeaway of connecting with your grandkids, Nana as your grandma name (my mom’s too), the asides at the ends of the stanzas (They love Nutella, I can’t wait to hear, Perfect). I must find myself a Postcard Project. My grandmother’s letters to me are one of my most treasured keepsakes – I have them stored in a box. They are timepieces of her life, telling of what happened the day she wrote, and are invaluable to me.
Ooooo – I love this, Kim. I want to find a project of my own! Could be a series of posts to see the progression. Thank you for this.
Kim,
First, the bookstore name is awesome! Love the postcard project t as you’ve described it. I wonder if the littles are wondering what you’ll ask each week. What a fun way to make memories, to slow down, to read and write. Honestly, I cannot look at postcards w/ out thinking about you! I wonder, would Kim like that postcard? We’ll see.
Your poem sold me! I have just ordered this delightful book for my grandchildren! It sounds so delightful.
Oh, my, when I read your poem I went and added The Postcard Project to my shopping cart. How fun is that? I love that you finding the postcard project to have:
Perfect!
I love, love, love this postcard project poem! “What did you eat today?
I’ll draw a tomato sandwich.
I wonder what the babies
Are eating.” Inspiration in your poem!
I used an ee cummings poem for annotation, and then wove those words into a cummings-style of poem (sort of)
This word
all alone
imagining buds
on trees,
the grass covering
the dust of winter
re-new-ing
re-knew-ing
How many words
have been tossed
away? Composted,
turned, reborn …
and now, we’ve gone
and lost the poem
to a page break /
broken spring
Poem: https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poetrymagazine/browse?contentId=25264
annotation:
Love this…losing the poem to a page break. Great notation!
Kevin, the visual poets are so clever the way they build in things to be seen that are never heard. I am a fan of audiobooks while driving, but if ever there were a great argument on the case for the printed page, cummings is our poster poet! Thank you!
I have loved cummings since childhood – oh my gosh, “reknewing” – I will hold onto that! The annotation graphic is nearly as awe-inspiring as your verse about composing (shall I say composting?) verse.
Kevin, having your annotated poem adds insight into the thought-process and makes this even more interesting. I’m struck by how the poem builds, from one word (all alone), incorporating imagery (covering dust of winter) and word play (re-knew-ing) to commenting on the process (how many words and more significantly, the losing of them as if the page is broken). Much admiration here.
“Re-new-ing / Re-knew-ing” – that’s all I need this morning.
Love this process. So imaginative. Thank you!
Kevin,
Isnt writing poems a way of annotating ourselves? The touch of humor at the end is a perfect way to give us something unexpected.
Kevin,
I’m thankful I started with your poem this morning. I instantly thought, before scrolling down, I need a visual! And voilà, here’s the masterpiece and visual to light my writing fire!
?❣️?❣️
Kevin — Fascinating… love the annotations, the wordplay, the analysis. And how sharp you are in the early morning. Susie
Love seeing your annotation and then your poem. I love this section: “How many words
have been tossed
away? Composted,
turned, reborn …” So fun to see Cummings in a new/knew way!
I love the metaphorical language in this, Kevin.